All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize