No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
