Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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