I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
