Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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