Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
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