Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
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