Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
