No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
