New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize