Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Randomize
