Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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