And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
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