So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
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