I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
