you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
The feeling are messing with the penis
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize