You can't motorboat a personality
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
where does the pee come out of this thing
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
