Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
