Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
