Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Moan for me like Helen Keller
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
