My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
