Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
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