Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
