Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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