walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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