Drunk walkin through police station. America
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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