Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
So much Jack, so little girl.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
