okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
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