Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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