How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Randomize
