i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
this just has baby written all over it
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
