and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
A bitchslap is in order.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
