I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
