Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
