we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
