my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
and you fell through a lawn chair
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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