I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
