You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
