Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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