New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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