Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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