so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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