You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
So vagazzling was a success
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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