I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize