Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
It's shark week go big or go home
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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