I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
