im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
