I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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