smell my finger.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
