You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
